Ok folks, i'm trying to be more like my family, so I'm putting together a little room tour, so everyone can finally see were we are living.

 So, after several tries, I finally managed to get the pictures off my phone and onto the blog. Problem was that blogger is a Google+ and wants to sync with my droid, and since i absolutely do not AUTO UPLOAD EVERY PICTURE INSTANTLY, cause not every picture i want seen ever, right, well...I had problems. Secondly, they loaded into the page backwards, getting reversed somewhere between the upload from phone to laptop, to Google+ web album?, then to Blogger. So, the moral......deal with it. Above is the boy, chilling on the bed. He's getting a nice grey chin and muzzle right now.

This is the bed area of the room. You can see the sloping ceiling as it comes down to the wall. The bed is actually about 8" away from the wall, as is the side table. The end table on the right, I picked up for free walking home from the bus. It fits perfectly between the bed and "wall", which is actually a box frame for a queen bed. You'll see later how it cuts off the door from the bed area, giving some privacy.

Sitting on the bed, looking back into the "living room" area. Nadine's hope chest makes the table for the laptop, stereo system, etc.. That mess in the corner is all office type stuff, paper, pens , markers, etc... i have a filing cabinet in the basement, need to dig it out. You can just make out the old school sky light, with crank style opening. I'm not a big fan of smoking in the house, but am also a realist, so at least the room can be well ventilated when Nadine comes home. With a quick move of the shelves, sporting Nadine's trophies, The futon lays down, and we have room for guests, with more pillows and blankets than I know what to do with.

This is a quick view of the closet area, and how all the dressers in this room fit nicely down the long wall.

These are the 3, no 4 dressers that create this wall. I found that old school mirror shelf unit, with the end table. It fits like it was meant to be, and now gives Nadine a HUGE make mirror. The lamp looks bright in the photo, but I will have to get something for across the top of the mirror. Also need to work on getting some picture frames up, ugh so much still to do.

 So, from the closet area, looking at the entrance area, you can see how the box frame becomes a great fake wall, separating the bed from the door, and preventing head injuries from the sloping ceiling, and yes I had many til I figured this out. After I took these, I realized the garbage hadn't been taken out, or laundry put away. I keep the entrance area pretty clear, cause I don't like running into stuff coming home.

From the entrance, you get to see the green room area, all the plants hide over there, loving the west facing window, and they love being next to the heater, the in wall black box. Unfortunately, the futon blocks some of the heat from the room, as does the fake wall, so air circulation isn't the best. Still working on making it an even temp in this room. You can really see the sloping ceiling and sky light. Again, having experienced head injury, the futon and shelves act as a natural barrier against walking into it.
 

As you step into the room, all you see is the living room area, the fake all box frame has done its job. I bought Nadine that tapestry the day she asked if she could come back.
 

This is the Red door at the top of the stairs. The symbolism of the Red door is not lost on me. But all you can see beyond is the tapestry, and nothing. I like the bed being hidden behind, allows for more privacy.
I also intentionally did not put a radio, or TV, or the laptop in the bedroom area. During some reading, it suggested that separating these activities into their own areas would help sleeping issues. Funny, but it works.

So, there, my first attempt at photo blog up load yadda yadda.

goodnight

The Year ahead, the year behind

So I guess i haven't thought alot about this, but its almost been a whole year since my return to Seattle after being left in Idaho my by EX. Doesn't feel like it, but when i sit and think about all that has happened to me since my return. I've been robbed, homeless, worked and quit 1 job, moved twice, and that was all in 9 months, crazy huh?

I ran into an old street friend yesterday while out shopping for a new phone. His name is Little John, and I meet him when i was homeless and working the corner of 1st and Pike, giving tourist info and flying signs with the dog. Because i treated it as my job, i was always there, everyday, so i got to know all the many colorful people that live and hustle that area. John was an alcoholic, crack smoker and heroin addict, boosting from stores and general no good. But i never judged anyone, helping out as i could. The homeless helping the homeless cause nobody else would. Before i left Seattle last summer for Boise Idaho, i "loaned" him $20, joking that i know "owned" his soul, which he agreed.
John is now just a functional alcoholic. To you, that may not sound like much of an improvement, but to an addict, on the streets, it is. While on the streets, i gave him the information and told him for a month, everyday, to go get on the state's GA-U program, file for SSDI and move to GA-X, then use the state's insurance to get onto the methadone wait list NOW, cause it takes 4-6 months to get in. He now admits it was the best thing he ever did. As we talked yesterday, he was so excited to see how well i was, to see the boy cause EVERYONE loves boodah james. Hasn't touched dope or crack since he got into the methadone program, cause he really wanted to get clean. We had talks about all the money we wasted, about how multiple addictions are worse, trying to come up with money for beer and dope just to function sucks. John's starting his detox soon, and while he still hustles for beer money, the bike cops rode right past without a second look.
I still see other from then, people that don't remember me, or haven't changed at all since then. I watch them from the bus stop downtown, doing the same hustle, the same loops around and around

time for an update

So this won't be to long as i need to still take the boy for a walk around the block before i head off on my long commute to west seattle to work.
"WHAT?" you say, "West Seattle?? Work??"
Now if you really did say that, then I 'd know you're not my friend  on facebook, cause everyone followed the drama of my life as I quit my job at Specialty's, a  job i liked, but a company i didn't. Ironically, the area manager that hated me, and yes, she really did hate me, well, after i quit because of her, she was fired herself because of a pending lawsuit/investigation related to health code violation issue. Truth, she made us, the store and its employee's remain open and producing product with NO RUNNING WATER in the store, none-hot or cold. Several employee's called the health board that day. I have worked in some filthy kitchens in my day's as a cook, (BluWater Bistro on Lake Union, the one that "burned", real filth hole, and it was 4 star). I guess I should really thank Susan for being the rude bitch that she was, cause without her, i would have never quit, or at least been available for the job I have now.
A TERRIBLE BEAUTY
No, its not a tragic story, but a great Irish pub that just expanded from one bar in Renton, to its new, smaller and way busier, more money making, West Seattle location, where I now work, thus the 2 hour commute both ways. 
I really just walked into this job, ready to work that day. The owners Jenna and Patty are very cool, and they know my friend Troy from KingStreet, so its cool, plus an old friend from Idaho, who moved up here to Seattle 10 years ago with me, Mark happens to just know Jenna and Pat too, and works on sundays at the Beauty, while kicking it full time at another job, like how I do the odd shift or two during soccer and football.
The first couple weeks were really rough. They had a friend acting as their Kitchen manager, and he not only failed to hire any prep cooks, line cooks or dishwashers, but then he quit the first day of a soft open.
I walked into my worst anxiety nightmare, a snafu kitchen where there was no training, cooking from the table menu cause there's no recipe's, can't find anything. Trial by fire, and not every one made the cut. Not everyone made the line either, and now things are settling out. We have a great chef now, things getting organized, tickets times and wait times are sooo much better.
I'm also hoping to move into a place here in a couple months out in West Seattle, well more White Center, but thats kinda ghetto. Its a nice 2 bed on a piece of land so there's a yard for the boy to run around in, and a potential garden spot between the garage and the road. Well see how things go. The owner is a good friend/my 2nd mom up here, but I'm trying to cut in line of another of her employee's who kinda wants the house too, but we'll see. If not, then I keep commuting and saving til I find something I guess.

oh there's power in them thar lines

So its nothing impressive, and i still have no way to post pictures to show everyone that we now have power back up and running. I'm not sure how it all worked out, and I don't really care, I just rent a room in  a house, that's all.
I've been really struggling with a lot of issues, things are just piling up and I'm having a hard time dealing with the depression again. Funny thing is that when I was homeless, on the streets, i had the best insurance ever, and was just starting to get on medications that seemed to help, but I wasn't able to stay on them long enough and couldn't afford to pay for the extra insurance wouldn't cover. So now that I'm back to being employed and with a house, why do I feel less happy and satisfied? Why is the destructive slide that always happens right before I lose a job starting again? And then there's always the what's the point, we all die in the end, overwhelming sense of dread and hopelessness. Or how about the I've spent my entire life working these jobs, and once the meals over, there's nothing left to ever prove what you did was even real. There is nothing tangible. And now I've wasted my life training in the street kitchen for a job i can't stand. 
And I'll need at least 2 PhD's to help me unscramble my brain after Nadine leaving me. I thought I had a handle on things til I went and staid with her a couple weeks ago, and now its like a bomb has gone off in my brain, my depression is worse 10 fold. I'm working on getting back with some of my doctors from before, but that's money, which requires a job, which means I need med's, from a doctor, which require money......
oh, and new blog I just started, to see if it helps my mind, http://naedemonstories.blogspot.com, or you can probably just link from here see as how right now I am the sites only guest and visitor, but who cares. I should warn you, its adult, very personal and deals with a lot of insane issues. Feel free to comment, but I won't really check them, cause the only person will tell me herself, if and when she reads them all, trying for 101 stories and letters.

My two week notice, and other such happenings

So I just realized that I haven't made a new post to this stupid thing in quite a long time, and since the whole point of this was to keep my friends and family up to date with my life, I guess I should write something while I have power, but I'll get to that....

I guess I should start with my job situation, since it seems to be the bane of my life right now. I actually like the job i currently have, don't get me wrong. As it has evolved from when I first started back in September, I have adapted and because I am truly one damn fine line cook, have had no problem doing my job. The problem currently has been two fold.
Point 1) Our store now does the entire production work for two stores. Thus everything has doubled, or in some cases tripled. And I mean everything, the amount of product produced every day, our inventory and product orders, and the time it takes to prep everything. Like hundreds of pounds of turkey being cooked, sliced and portioned every day. But no real extra staff was assigned, and no extra labor hours are allowed. I went from making 60 gallons of soup a week, to over 140 gallons a week now. But the manager, and I'll get to her later in point 2, well she has no clue about how to produce that much, and doesn't understand why I can't do that in my old timeline, ie in two days. Now I might be assuming too much here, but I think any rational person will see that double the work= double the time, especially since I don't get double the production equipment. I only have the two 40 quart steam kettles. My production capacity is limited. And then throw in the lack of basic product needed to do my job, regardless of how much I need to do, and well.....we run short. Not much I can do about it.
Point 2) Our store has no real manager. Our GM was sent to another store to help turn it around and become more like our store, which somehow mistakenly has been credited to her great management skills, but please don't make me laugh. It the crew of my store, the lowly people that work there day after thankless day that make my store what it is. It has absolutely nothing to do with our GM. So she is hardly ever at our store anymore, and has no idea what has been happening with this whole double production experiment. To top things off, the kitchen manager that we all love and adore and would bad mouth the GM with, well she was sent off for 2 months of training, to do the job she's been doing for months. Now what kind of idiot would take their GM, and their KM and send them away at the same time you start this huge change??? SPECIALTY'S!!!
Now, like I said, I do like my job, and I do like the people I work with, i have just come to hate the company I work for. Its sad when even the area manager, who doesn't really like me, but can't find any fault with what I do and we just smile at each other when ever she comes through, tells us to "Fake it till you make it", or until Friday. So I did put in my two weeks notice today, and all my friends from work have given me their full support on facebook, everyone understands its not the job, its the GM that needs to go away, now, to her new store, and leave us alone to do our jobs, that we all know how to do by ourselves, which is how she got that damn GM of the Year award, which I think has clouded her mind, made her forget just who actually does the work on a $6,000 day, cause it sure as hell ain't her all by herself.

ok, slight pause to get another Jameson on the rock, yes I'm at a bar. Free power and internet, why not

Let's move on to another topic, how about housing?
So I live in a room for rent house in the northgate area of Seattle, just blocks from North Seattle Community College. I moved into the place in November, and since then, the power has been turned off 3 times that I know of, and the water twice. Now the situation is a little weird, see the landlord Gil, is married to Scott's ex wife. Scott and Gil are friends cause they both hate Scott's ex wife, follow? Scott moved from DC five years ago, to be near his kids, needed a place to stay for a bit, and Gil happens to have a couple rental properties like this house. So Scott moved in. Five years later, I have learned through several phone calls to Gil and talks with Scott many things. Most important is that in five years of the utilities in Scott's name, Gil has paid the bills off completely 3 times, and now once again, they are way past due. The power bill is $3,000 and the water is $1,500. The power company was so mad at Scott for cutting the locks off and turning the power back on him self, same with the water, that the utility companies came first of april and took the meters. Yes, you heard right, no power or water since April. At first, one of the other housemates was borrowing power from the neighbors, to which I paid into, and was able to keep my laptop charged, thus having internet and netflix at home, so I didn't care. But since he owed like two months rent, he has sinced moved out and has taken his miles of cords with him. And Scott steals water by hooking up a pipe at night to the main, connecting the house, to which I guiltily use cause come on, with my families bowel movements, its only fair to the world. (Kevin and Chris will understand) I cook on a propane camp stove in the kitchen, so dinners are limited to skillet creations or soup pots, like instant potatoes or rice. I use the same pan, pot, plate and fork, so the disaster that has become the kitchen is not me. Thankfully, I am well practiced in this type of living from being homeless, and since there's no utilities, I'm not paying rent, which is money I need for food, since I eat alot of take-out and delivery, laundry, not to mention my medication need has increased, which means more money for the green and Jameson. Thank the Gods for that four-legged heater of mine. He's such a trooper right now. We go to bed so early now, or he's left home alone now that Mark doesn't live there to play with him. And I know my depression right now, not wanting to do anything, or leave the house, is affecting him, and I feel bad.

WOW!!! That's some much drama and BS simplified down. So overwhelming. My ADD has kicked in and just ordered some dinner, Fully loaded chicken nachos. So that's it folks. Not nearly as exciting as my siblings posts, with their fancy pictures and colorful fonts, its just not me.

Almost been a month

I just don't know where the time goes lately. Its been almost a month since my last post, though nothing tends to change, so the days blur together and dissolve into weeks.
Work has been a little crazy lately, with many changes happening and more to come. Our store manager is being transferred to another store, so she is splitting her time between the two stores, which means things are even more chaotic. And now starting this week, our store is responsible for the prep and production of not only our stuff, but for the Bellvue Square as well. That's right folks, double the workload for everyone, without the resources or space. And once the toll starts on the 520 bridge, figure 4-6 trips a day, i don't know how the powers that be think this idea will save money.
I'm still working the Boeing angle, have been applying for every entry level position that opens up, but with no clear response, I'm not sure how its going. I'm in no hurry right now, and have some other things working as well, like picking up a couple shifts back at KingStreet hopefully, once baseball starts here in april.
Sadly, that's really all there is to this whole month. I've just been working and trying to stay afloat until I can figure out what to do next with my life. For the first time in 8 years, I have no idea of what to do.

Where did this week go??

I don't know where time went, but it sure doesn't feel like a week has gone by since I got out of the hospital. My wrist still hurts, but the specialist that I went and saw yesterday said it looks great and is healing fine, keep doing what I was doing, end of story. So I guess that's then end of it, But I still don't have full motion back yet.

I have been doing alot of thinking about where I was last year, it seems like a whole different life time ago that I was squatting in that beautiful commercial lot up in the CD, at first so I could stay close to Nadine in Nickelsville. But when they barred her, and she went to Tent City #4, I stayed where I was. It was a good place, well built, park with bathrooms open 24/7 just 2 blocks away, on a major bus line. I was fortunate that the winter past was very mild, moderate temps and no snow, just rain. I was out in the weather every day, me and Boodah both, up by 9 and downtown to our spot, ready to work by 10am. I was my own boss, and stayed til 6 almost every night, then we'd head home, via the park, and be back in our boy-scout special ready for bed by 8. I lived pretty much my life based on the sunlight and weather.

Having read my sisters blog about how her and her husband Tyler hooked up per say, made me realize that I haven't had to build a new relationship like that in over 8 years. There was Danielle, and then Nadine, and I thought that was to be it. I feel to old to start all over with somebody. Its hard when I've spent so much time invested in such a deep soulful relationship, as the one between me and Nadine, one built on years of friendship first, then further. Now I have to start all over again, which does give me the chance to "hide" some parts of my past, but in the end, its my past that makes me who I am. And honestly, I'm too old to care, I am who I am, colorful past included.

Was excited to finally take some pictures and get them uploaded to my blog and Facebook, but as I was putting new batteries into it, I dropped it, and now it has issues. I can't believe that this camera traveled in my bag the whole time I was homeless and managed to survive, to Boise an back to Seattle, the only thing of value that Bitch from SouthPark didn't keep of mine when she robbed me and threw me out. Of course, it was in my bag, so I had it the whole time. I hope that if I work it a bit, maybe it will turn on, then case is loose and the buttons get stuck sometimes. I discovered that tis laptop has like 4 different card slots to transfer info from, so uploads should have been quick, and video too. Oh well, you will all just have to wait now. I am also working on  getting the scanner/printer of mine working again too, just looking for a power cord for it, somewhere in the mess.