I don't know where time went, but it sure doesn't feel like a week has gone by since I got out of the hospital. My wrist still hurts, but the specialist that I went and saw yesterday said it looks great and is healing fine, keep doing what I was doing, end of story. So I guess that's then end of it, But I still don't have full motion back yet.
I have been doing alot of thinking about where I was last year, it seems like a whole different life time ago that I was squatting in that beautiful commercial lot up in the CD, at first so I could stay close to Nadine in Nickelsville. But when they barred her, and she went to Tent City #4, I stayed where I was. It was a good place, well built, park with bathrooms open 24/7 just 2 blocks away, on a major bus line. I was fortunate that the winter past was very mild, moderate temps and no snow, just rain. I was out in the weather every day, me and Boodah both, up by 9 and downtown to our spot, ready to work by 10am. I was my own boss, and stayed til 6 almost every night, then we'd head home, via the park, and be back in our boy-scout special ready for bed by 8. I lived pretty much my life based on the sunlight and weather.
Having read my sisters blog about how her and her husband Tyler hooked up per say, made me realize that I haven't had to build a new relationship like that in over 8 years. There was Danielle, and then Nadine, and I thought that was to be it. I feel to old to start all over with somebody. Its hard when I've spent so much time invested in such a deep soulful relationship, as the one between me and Nadine, one built on years of friendship first, then further. Now I have to start all over again, which does give me the chance to "hide" some parts of my past, but in the end, its my past that makes me who I am. And honestly, I'm too old to care, I am who I am, colorful past included.
Was excited to finally take some pictures and get them uploaded to my blog and Facebook, but as I was putting new batteries into it, I dropped it, and now it has issues. I can't believe that this camera traveled in my bag the whole time I was homeless and managed to survive, to Boise an back to Seattle, the only thing of value that Bitch from SouthPark didn't keep of mine when she robbed me and threw me out. Of course, it was in my bag, so I had it the whole time. I hope that if I work it a bit, maybe it will turn on, then case is loose and the buttons get stuck sometimes. I discovered that tis laptop has like 4 different card slots to transfer info from, so uploads should have been quick, and video too. Oh well, you will all just have to wait now. I am also working on getting the scanner/printer of mine working again too, just looking for a power cord for it, somewhere in the mess.
Saturday, February 26, 2011
Sunday, February 20, 2011
A trip to the ER
So I thought I'd try and get this blog written now while I'm all doped up and my wrist pain has turned into a dull throbbing pain.
Ok, so I was walking to the bus last Tuesday morning, when I tripped over a raised sidewalk edge, which Seattle seems to have many. I completely wiped out, and actually took a "Family Guy" moment as I lay there in pain. I got up and went to work, without thinking anything of it. By the next morning, my left wrist was a little sore, but nothing to unbearable. Later that night, I noticed that it had started to swell up a bit, so I put ice on it, elevated it and gave it no more thought. By Thursday morning, the wrist had swollen up so much that I could barely touch my fingers together. I tried to gimp my way through work, but once my manager saw it, she immediately sen me home to get medical attention, which I had planned to do anyways, but after work, since they've been cutting my hours now, and I need every one I can get.
Seattle has many many hospitals, but if you are poor, homeless, critically injured or uninsured, there is only one place that will take you, regardless of your ability to pay, and that's HarborView. Now I have been there several times, but this was my first adventure as a patient. I arrived around 1:30pm on thursday, and checked in, filled out my admittance paperwork and my financial charity application, which was approved, so this whole adventure would now be free, which is why I think they just went nuts in my treatment. But I'm getting ahead of myself. I then sat in the ER waiting room until 7:30pm, when I was finally taken back to a bed in the ER. I almost left twice, thinking how stupid it was to spend so much time just to have a doctor tell me my wrist was just sprained and I needed to go home, ice it and then wrap it. Well, they looked at it and wanted to get some x-rays of the wrist. But before that, they wanted to draw blood for tests and cultures, and place an IV, for fluids. At this point, I was very open with the nurses about my past Vascular abuse (if you have to ask, then you don't know me that well), and sure enough I provided even the best nurse there with a challenge. Not only did they have to find a usable vein, but then they had to hit it and thread the catheter into it and get it to hold. After 3 tries, they finally managed to get a small (22ga) IV into a similarly small vein in my upper arm, almost to my shoulder. Crazy part was that they couldn't draw blood out of it with the syringe, so with this needle and splint sticking out of my arm like a small drip faucet, they free bled me to get my blood samples, then hooked the IV up, which accepted and flushed without problems. At this point I'd like to explain how nasty of a taste in the back of your mouth you get every time they flush the IV line with saline. If you never experienced it, you're lucky. So its now about 9:30pm, and they get my blood work back, with elevated white cell count, an indicator of septic infection. So they start me on a an Antibiotic that made me turn bright red and made me feel like I was on fire. After an hour, when the IV was done and they came to get me for X-rays, they noticed my condition and got all upset that I hadn't said anything to them about this discomfort. Honestly, after the 1mg shot of Dilaudid, aka Hydromorphone, a powerful narcotic used to treat pain, I really didn't notice or care about any minor pain. Anyways, its now pushing 11:00pm and they take me to get X-rayed, 8 times, just to discover that there is no break or fracture, which then brings the orthopedic surgeons into my life. They sent me to get a CT scan, which involved pushing a marker dye through the IV, more instance fire in the veins. The result of all of this, was that I had a pocket of fluid build-up in my wrist and they suspected it was septic, leading to an abscess, that must be drained. So I was loaded up with more pain meds, oxycodone this time, and then they numbed my whole hand with Lydocaine, and right there in the ER room, they made an inch long cut in my wrist and tried to force the puss and fluid out. But nothing came out, which seemed to annoy the doctors. It was at this point, they decided to keep my overnight, kept pushing antibiotics in me and try again in the morning to drain the infection. I was NOT happy about staying. I just wanted them to patch me up, give me the oral antibiotic and send me home. My wrist now looked and felt worse than before. Plus I was starting to feel sick, cause I hadn't eaten all day. Around 3:30 am, I was moved to the 6th floor, to an actual hospital bed. And once again they tried to put a new IV in me. But my reputation of a hard poke/poor vascular condition had proceeded me. My nurse Jen took up the challenge, and it proved to much. I suffered quietly as she tried to hit veins on the top of my left foot, the top of my right foot, across my right ankle and the side of my right palm, some of THE MOST PAINFUL PLACES EVER TO POKE!!!!! She got frustrated with it, and was very thankful I wasn't upset by it. Really it would have done no good to complain. I had nobody to blame but myself for this, seeing as how I trashed all the of the biggest, easiest veins everywhere. I know understood what my councilor at treatment was trying to tell us, about leaving one spot, one vein untouched for just such an event. They finally managed to get a good, solid IV in my right ring finger, still painful, but it was a super site. So now everything, the antibiotic, I'm on 2 different kinds now, plus fluids are all funneled down and pushed into that tinny little vein we all have on each side of our fingers. And thats how my first 14 hours went. I'll finish the rest later, but basically, its more the same. Sorry, but my hand hurts alot right now.
Ok, so I was walking to the bus last Tuesday morning, when I tripped over a raised sidewalk edge, which Seattle seems to have many. I completely wiped out, and actually took a "Family Guy" moment as I lay there in pain. I got up and went to work, without thinking anything of it. By the next morning, my left wrist was a little sore, but nothing to unbearable. Later that night, I noticed that it had started to swell up a bit, so I put ice on it, elevated it and gave it no more thought. By Thursday morning, the wrist had swollen up so much that I could barely touch my fingers together. I tried to gimp my way through work, but once my manager saw it, she immediately sen me home to get medical attention, which I had planned to do anyways, but after work, since they've been cutting my hours now, and I need every one I can get.
Seattle has many many hospitals, but if you are poor, homeless, critically injured or uninsured, there is only one place that will take you, regardless of your ability to pay, and that's HarborView. Now I have been there several times, but this was my first adventure as a patient. I arrived around 1:30pm on thursday, and checked in, filled out my admittance paperwork and my financial charity application, which was approved, so this whole adventure would now be free, which is why I think they just went nuts in my treatment. But I'm getting ahead of myself. I then sat in the ER waiting room until 7:30pm, when I was finally taken back to a bed in the ER. I almost left twice, thinking how stupid it was to spend so much time just to have a doctor tell me my wrist was just sprained and I needed to go home, ice it and then wrap it. Well, they looked at it and wanted to get some x-rays of the wrist. But before that, they wanted to draw blood for tests and cultures, and place an IV, for fluids. At this point, I was very open with the nurses about my past Vascular abuse (if you have to ask, then you don't know me that well), and sure enough I provided even the best nurse there with a challenge. Not only did they have to find a usable vein, but then they had to hit it and thread the catheter into it and get it to hold. After 3 tries, they finally managed to get a small (22ga) IV into a similarly small vein in my upper arm, almost to my shoulder. Crazy part was that they couldn't draw blood out of it with the syringe, so with this needle and splint sticking out of my arm like a small drip faucet, they free bled me to get my blood samples, then hooked the IV up, which accepted and flushed without problems. At this point I'd like to explain how nasty of a taste in the back of your mouth you get every time they flush the IV line with saline. If you never experienced it, you're lucky. So its now about 9:30pm, and they get my blood work back, with elevated white cell count, an indicator of septic infection. So they start me on a an Antibiotic that made me turn bright red and made me feel like I was on fire. After an hour, when the IV was done and they came to get me for X-rays, they noticed my condition and got all upset that I hadn't said anything to them about this discomfort. Honestly, after the 1mg shot of Dilaudid, aka Hydromorphone, a powerful narcotic used to treat pain, I really didn't notice or care about any minor pain. Anyways, its now pushing 11:00pm and they take me to get X-rayed, 8 times, just to discover that there is no break or fracture, which then brings the orthopedic surgeons into my life. They sent me to get a CT scan, which involved pushing a marker dye through the IV, more instance fire in the veins. The result of all of this, was that I had a pocket of fluid build-up in my wrist and they suspected it was septic, leading to an abscess, that must be drained. So I was loaded up with more pain meds, oxycodone this time, and then they numbed my whole hand with Lydocaine, and right there in the ER room, they made an inch long cut in my wrist and tried to force the puss and fluid out. But nothing came out, which seemed to annoy the doctors. It was at this point, they decided to keep my overnight, kept pushing antibiotics in me and try again in the morning to drain the infection. I was NOT happy about staying. I just wanted them to patch me up, give me the oral antibiotic and send me home. My wrist now looked and felt worse than before. Plus I was starting to feel sick, cause I hadn't eaten all day. Around 3:30 am, I was moved to the 6th floor, to an actual hospital bed. And once again they tried to put a new IV in me. But my reputation of a hard poke/poor vascular condition had proceeded me. My nurse Jen took up the challenge, and it proved to much. I suffered quietly as she tried to hit veins on the top of my left foot, the top of my right foot, across my right ankle and the side of my right palm, some of THE MOST PAINFUL PLACES EVER TO POKE!!!!! She got frustrated with it, and was very thankful I wasn't upset by it. Really it would have done no good to complain. I had nobody to blame but myself for this, seeing as how I trashed all the of the biggest, easiest veins everywhere. I know understood what my councilor at treatment was trying to tell us, about leaving one spot, one vein untouched for just such an event. They finally managed to get a good, solid IV in my right ring finger, still painful, but it was a super site. So now everything, the antibiotic, I'm on 2 different kinds now, plus fluids are all funneled down and pushed into that tinny little vein we all have on each side of our fingers. And thats how my first 14 hours went. I'll finish the rest later, but basically, its more the same. Sorry, but my hand hurts alot right now.
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Blast from my past
So an old friend of mine from high school, well actually I was her prom date, but out of the blue, she manages to get a hold of me. And to many things worked out for this reunion of souls to be just chance. I not only got my laptop and internet on the same day she got a hold of me, but it was Valentines Day too. So fo rthe past couple days we've been exchanging long messages via facebook, getting caught up on where the last 17 years went. And when I really sat down and plotted out how I got from graduation to here, well it was quite an eye opener, which has fueled my desire and need for this new career. I don't know how to feel or react. I'm excited to talk to her, to read her messages and learn what's going on in her life. Its like being in high school all over again, only I'm not the sheltered, and way over-protected ubber geek this time around. I believe the saying is "Older, Wiser and Well Trained." Downside, she is married with 4 kids, and while yes I do have a past with married women, nothing good ever came from it. And I am in no way asking her to do anything of the sort, we're in 2 seperate states, with one in between. But it more than quick comfortable friendship, based on a crazy time before drugs and women jaded me. I do find myself wondering what could have been, but that will never happen, so I try and focus on the what will be. These things take time, and like the good job at Boeing, this isn't happening overnight.
Monday, February 14, 2011
The wait is over!!
So my laptop finally arrived from Sony today, and I've spent most of the evening playing with it as I get all the bugs worked out, get the security set the way I like, turned on the auto sign in feature, and got my ClearWire 4G modem working. It seems to do fine loading web pages and such, but I haven't had the best luck with streaming video or audio. During a test phone call to mom, the video lag was noticable. And while trying to listen to streaming audio from my favorite web site, the stops and starts got rather annoying. I hope that maybe if I locate a good wifi network around, it will provide better options, until I decide what to do, or if I decide to change providers. Its probably not a good thing that on their own web home page, they have open forums with titles that are nothing positive for the company. Sure, ClearWire may have coverage here in Seattle, and while they do provide 4G speed, it does no good when they don't provide the bandwidth needed to power todays electronics. And Seattle's attempt at free wifi for all, with several locations like pioneer square and the u-district providing free wifi coverage over a large area, is also not up-to-speed. And that's my rant on that, technology causing stress and anxiety.
On the career front, I have started building my resume online with that local company starting in B, ending in ING, I mentioned earlier. Its going to take me some time to get everything just right, to copy and re-word the job descriptions they provide, working them to reflect my skills and my abilities. This new career jump is a totally new direction, and I'm not rushing into this, taking my time and a few months to get things right. Plus Nadine's man Dustin is helping me, working on getting some phone numbers so I can jump right to the front of the line, so to speak. Its exciting right now, cause theyt just unrolled their newest product and are waiting on a government bid, which will be BIG. I'm actually excited for this change. It will provide me the ability to maybe buy a house or condo here in the Seattle area in about 5 years, right as the market finally stabilizes here. Plus it provides great health insurance, some retirement security and the possibility of a future beyond restaurants. I realized that nothing that I have made as a cook, in 20 years, is around or exists today. My whole life's work, and nothing to show for it, but my knowledge and skill, which is not enough for me. I want to be able 10 years from now, to point and say " I helped build that." Something more concrete and personal. I know it sounds lame, but I've only got about 20 years of work left in me, if that, before my back and knees finally quit on me, and as of right now, living paycheck to paycheck, it scares the hell out of me. Having been unemployed for almost 2 years and being homeless too, for the first time in my life, I'm looking forward, far forward, into my future.
As I work out the bugs, I'll finally start getting some picture uploaded to my post, as well as facebook too. There really isn't much to show around here, but maybe the lake, and I know you all want to see what an awesome place I live in. And it is, in its own way.
On the career front, I have started building my resume online with that local company starting in B, ending in ING, I mentioned earlier. Its going to take me some time to get everything just right, to copy and re-word the job descriptions they provide, working them to reflect my skills and my abilities. This new career jump is a totally new direction, and I'm not rushing into this, taking my time and a few months to get things right. Plus Nadine's man Dustin is helping me, working on getting some phone numbers so I can jump right to the front of the line, so to speak. Its exciting right now, cause theyt just unrolled their newest product and are waiting on a government bid, which will be BIG. I'm actually excited for this change. It will provide me the ability to maybe buy a house or condo here in the Seattle area in about 5 years, right as the market finally stabilizes here. Plus it provides great health insurance, some retirement security and the possibility of a future beyond restaurants. I realized that nothing that I have made as a cook, in 20 years, is around or exists today. My whole life's work, and nothing to show for it, but my knowledge and skill, which is not enough for me. I want to be able 10 years from now, to point and say " I helped build that." Something more concrete and personal. I know it sounds lame, but I've only got about 20 years of work left in me, if that, before my back and knees finally quit on me, and as of right now, living paycheck to paycheck, it scares the hell out of me. Having been unemployed for almost 2 years and being homeless too, for the first time in my life, I'm looking forward, far forward, into my future.
As I work out the bugs, I'll finally start getting some picture uploaded to my post, as well as facebook too. There really isn't much to show around here, but maybe the lake, and I know you all want to see what an awesome place I live in. And it is, in its own way.
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