Still I press on

So I have picked up a dishwashing/closing shift at specialties this saturday, which is better than sitting in the camp with nothing to do, I guess. And since I have no money or my dog and no real social life as to speak of yet, I guess its good that i just keep myself busy and keep making as much money as possible, for my own place that my dog Boodah will finally join me at!!! I can't believe how fast time has actually gone by. I've been back in Seattle now, with a job for 46 days, and have been homeless for 14 days this saturday. My bosss at work pulled me aside to day after work and was very conserned that I was ok, was I doing well, was I eating, did I have money, she even offered to buy my next bus pass and I haven't paid her for the first one yet. Mary's even willing to be a reference for me, both professional and personal. And I try to joke about my situation as much as possible at work, trying to not take anything to serious and find the bright side every day. Its hard and exhausting!! I really wish my dog was here with me!!! I try and keep up a front, and by all outward appearences I seem ok, but inside I am miserable and depressed. I have really started to ask my self why am I here in Seattle. I can work anywhere, and since I've thought about going back to school, I can do that anywhere too. I don't really have anything major going for me, a small social safety net, but not really. Maybe things will get better, but i have seriously set myself a deadline for a decision, that when the camp gets ready to move on November 14th, what are my plans?? To stay, find housing and get my dog up here, or do I take all that housing money, rent a truck and move it all back to...? Why Idaho??? I really could move anywhere, right, but then I'd be in the same situation, needing housing and a job, but now with no money. So I kinda have to think on this. I mean Idaho is ok, and what i hate about it isn't that bad, but it feels too much like I failed and am returning home, instead of moving home after a good career here in Seattle. Maybe I'll stay here until Karen and Terry move with the girls, and tag along, who knows. It hurts my mind thinking of all these things.